Breaking Bonds
by SebbyNinja666
Summary: *FINISHED*I do not own homestuck or the trolls*Genderbent. AU. Kurloz takes on the project of helping his female counterpart move on with her life, and the two do a lot of emotional bonding thoughout the time they spend together.
1. Chappie 1

He was just sitting there, come to think of it, that seemed to be all he did when he wasn't hanging out with Gamzee, Meulin, or Mituna…or pestering said trolls. Although I probably did a lot less than his since I didn't talk to anyone. I just couldn't bring myself to make idle chitchat with the others; even Mitina had given up on me. _This damned purple blood is cursed._'

I eased myself onto the ground next to Kurloz and we exchanged nothing more than a passing glance. We didn't communicate much since I barely understood his signing, and got headaches too easily from telepathy.

He was mournfully staring at the ground, obviously thinking about Meulin. Sighing softly, I rolled the sleeve of my shirt up to peel off the purple stained gauze that covered my gray skin. This whole thing was Meanah's fault. None of this would have happened if he hadn't taken my chucklevoodoo.

Kurloz glanced over briefly and it was pretty obvious to tell what he was thinking. "As if _you_ are any better."

He shook his head slightly and I glared at him. "I didn't stitch my mouth shut."

He sighed softly and shook his head again. "You act like she's dead."

Kurloz stared down at the ground, and wanting to her his thoughts on the matter, I pulled out a tattered notebook and a pencil. I dropped it into his lap, and Kurloz turned past all the miscellaneous doodles and sketches to find a blank page. _I don't feel like 'talking'._

"You just did." He put the notebook back in my lap, along with the pencil. I stared down at it sadly. Kurloz was probably the only person who would understand, and I was too scared to even ask him for help. Most of it probably came from me not wanting to accept the fact that I had a problem because that would mean that I accepted the fact that Maulen was dead. And I didn't…or couldn't…I didn't know if I was ready to move on.

Kurloz dropped the notebook back in my lap after having scrawled, _stop thinking about it._

"Why?"

_It helps._

"How am I supposed to do that? All of his stuff is there and I can't just get rid of it."

_Why don't you just put it all in an empty room, or a closet?_

_"Everything_ is exactally where I left it…I can't bring myself to move it."

I brought my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them while he wrote, _it's a slow process, you just have to take the first step._

"I don't know if I'm _ready_."

He kept scribbling away, then erasing things, the fact that things were taking this long scared me a bit. Every time he rewrote something I grew more apprehensive, and at this point, hoped he wasn't chewing me out.

The pencil scratched across the paper for several more seconds, before he sighed, and went to erase something once again, only I didn't let him. Snatching the notebook out of his hand, I tried to make it seem like I was being impatient.

_You must be if you are willing to talk about it, and you may not realize it, but on some subconscious level that must also mean you ARE ready. You just don't want to admit it to yourself._

I stared down at the paper, wondering if it was really that obvious. Kurloz gently took the notebook out of my hand, then gave it back shortly after; _I'll help you if you want._

"Really?" Kurloz nodded and stood, extending his gloved hand towards me, silently urging me to start now. Not giving myself too much time to think it through, I placed my hand in his and grabbed my bag, leading the way back towards my hive.

I stood there staring at the blue hat that was casually draped across the back of the chair with my hand suspended in mid-air, unable to reach forward the last few inches to rest it on top of the soft fabric.

He had always worn it when we were out for walks; he called it his exploring hat. While we were out I'd pull it down over his ears, that _always_ seemed to be cold, and he'd crinkle his nose. Then he'd put a rock or a handful of dirt into my bag to compensate with this mischievous gleam in his eyes. He'd attempt to tousle my hair as I feigned annoyance, before settling for jumping onto my back and asking me if I was mad. To which I would always respond with 'maybe' until he rested his head against mine and apologize, before dropping some more dirt or another rock in my bag and run off, leaving me to playfully chase after him.

Kurloz, having been looking on for several minutes now, dropped the notebook on the table in front of me, _just touch it._

It was really easier said than done, I managed to reach forward a fraction of an inch more, anxiety already rising. _This is going to work._

I closed my eyes tightly, ready to just call the whole things off, until Kurloz came up behind e and placed his hand on top of mine, gently forcing my hand onto the hat. My entire body trembled slightly, as he then slightly moved his to the left then took several steps back.

I couldn't even bring myself to look at it and turned to face Kurloz, who wore the smallest smile possible and slowly signed, _just take it slow_. Luckily I actually understood it, and laughed nervously. It was taking every ounce of self-control I had not to turn around and move the hat back. We had barely begun to move everything and I already wanted to curl up in the corner and cry. It wasn't in in its spot…no it wasn't where _he _left it.

A few minutes had passed before I could bring myself to open my eyes again. Kurloz nodded approvingly, the small smile becoming more profound. "Thank you."

He nodded again, and I turned back towards the chair with newfound courage. Grabbing the blue hat I went down the hall and placed it in the room across the hall from my respite block.

Returning to the other room, I realized just how little I actually had to move, it still didn't make things easier though. Seeing all my various toys and tricks lying about, I decided to waste time the best way I knew how. Grabbing my empty purple handbag from behind the couch, I began cleaning up all of my stuff. Kurloz quickly caught on to what I was doing and began helping, purposely leaving all of Maulen's stuff to me.

Sadly, we only wasted about fifteen minutes and I found out I was down about three jack-in-the-boxes. I _wanted_ to waste some more time by searching for them, but Kurloz was having none of it. He dropped the notebook in my lap, _how much longer do you plan on putting this off?_

"I don't know…"

_Move two more things and I'll leave you alone._

Once reminded of what I was supposed to be doing, I found myself not wanting to continue, especially since that empty place where his hat was supposed to be was glaring at me. "I can't do it."

_Yes you can, you already started._

"I'll probably just wind up putting it back after you leave."

_Then you'll have to move it again when I come back tomorrow._ I had no will to do this, it _sounded_ easy and _seemed_ like a good idea. But I didn't want to forget, and I wasn't ready. With all his stuff lying around, it maintained the illusion that he was coming back, and I wasn't as lonely. "Why do you care so much?"

_I have faith in you being able to move on._

"Why?"

_With Maulen gone, it'll be easier to move on; at least I think it should._

"Don't you have the same confidence for yourself?" Kurloz paused for a long time, before settling himself on the floor across from me. The silence continued on and I figured he just wasn't going to answer.

The he slowly shook his head, _we're too close._ It went quiet again, and I found myself not wanting to disappoint him.

"Will you help me?" Kurloz met my hesitant glance with a reassuring gaze, and nodded firmly.

"I guess we should get started then." Standing decidedly, I made an effort to finish moving all of Maulen's things.

Although when the front room was almost empty, I found myself losing momentum, it was _empty_, like it had been for nearly an entire sweep, it just didn't look it before. The sight of it was enough to send a pang of loneliness through me. The sight of it shattered the illusion, and I felt like I was realizing for a second time that he was never coming back.

Leaning heavily against the wall I blinked slowly, trying to prevent myself from crying, and softly asked, "Can we finish this tomorrow?"

Kurloz nodded as he came to stand in front of me, concern flashing through his white eyes. I managed a half-hearted smile, "I'm just tired."

His eye narrowed, and he obviously wasn't buying it, "Don't give me that look." Kurloz rested his hands on either side of my head, refusing to drop the subject. So was I, the last thing I wanted him to see was me breaking down after making so much 'progress' because I didn't want to be alone.

In one motion, Kurloz took me into his arms, pulling me against his chest, and resting his head against mine. Despite this, I didn't want him to let go, this was the safest I'd felt in a long time.

Shortly after, his mental presence caught me off guard, I didn't know what he was planning on doing and we both knew what kind of damage we could cause in each other's heads. Not that I would do anything, because I promised, no more mind control, and no more chucklevoodoo's. _Don't be afraid of the changes that are coming, they were bound to happen eventually._

His voice, was a lot deeper than I expected it to be, and since it was telepathy it echoed a bit, leaving me feeling reassured as warm, purple tears rolled down the sides of my face. "It's just hard."

He placed one of his hands on the back of my hand; _I never said it wouldn't be._

"I know, I just wish it wasn't."

_Just give it time._ He left suddenly, then slowly released me, wiping a tear off my face. He smiled warmly, and pointed towards the door.

I nodded, not quite ready to watch him go, not that I would admit it to him. _Maybe Mitina will let me stay with her…_ "See you tomorrow."

Kurloz nodded taking a couple steps to the door, then turned suddenly. As if he knew what I was thinking he signed, _do you want me to stay?_

I didn't understand all the letters, but I knew enough to fill in the blanks, "You don't have to…I was going to go to Mitina's anyway." I tried to shrug it off, but he was already signing, and I missed about half of it. "What, go slower?"

Kurloz sighed, and didn't even bother signing again, going to the notebook. _That's not what I asked._

"I'm fine." Kurloz arched an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed with the blatant lie I had told, "I'm used to being alone."

He was still unimpressed, and wrote, _I'm staying._

"You don't have to."

Kurloz stubbornly wrote, _I know, I'm not stupid, it's just time you learned how to motherfucking sign!_

A smile crept onto my face after reading the last part, "Why, isn't this fun?"

Kurloz had the most un-amused expression possible plastered across his face. I don't even think I've seen Kankri less amused. "Awww, does someone need a hug?" I couldn't remember the last time I felt this energize, and it was quite refreshing.

Kurloz shook his head in disagreement, but I still gave him one anyway. I took a small ball out of my bag and tossed it him. Kurloz, not knowing any better, caught it, and it exploded. Green dust covered his arms and chest, and a small smile worked its way onto his face as I giggled uncontrollably. I couldn't remember the last time I pulled a joke on someone.

The door burst open, and Letola entered, "Mitina's having one of her fits, only she keeps screaming for you." I couldn't remember the last time I had been needed in one of Mitina's fits, I don't even know the last time she had one, since we haven't been talking…at all.

"I guess I better head down there then," before heading out I turned to Kurloz, and told him to leave whenever he wanted. Something in the back of my mind was telling me this wouldn't be a small affair, and I didn't want him to feel like he was obligated to wait for me.

A vase shattered against the wall, not even an inch away from my head, as I entered Mitina's trashed hive. "Look who decided to fucking show up! I didn't think you would actually show up. At this moment, you're probably the most fucking useless moirail I've ever seen!"

I nodded, being agreeable for the time being, most of the time she'd just burn herself out. I ducked as she threw something else at me. There was a soft pause and she softly asked, "Unless you don't want to me my moirail anymore…Not that I'd fucking care, you'd probably just leave again anyway."

"That's not true!"

"Bullshit! All you do is mope around like a little bitch! Why don't you try talking to someone…instead of dropping off the face of the fucking planet?!"

"You're right, in fact Kurloz volunteered to help me out."

Seemed a bit more irritated than she had been, Mitina shifted her weight, "Woopdy fucking do! It's not like you're back to caring! You're probably only here because Letola sent you."

Taking a hesitant few steps forward, I slowly replied, "Yes, that is why I came here, but-

"Just fucking leave me alone!"

"No."

Mitina stared down at the floor, softly asking, "Why not?"

I continued to close the space between us, "I haven't been a very good friend or moirail lately, and I am going to try to be there for you…unless you don't want me to.

Mitina eyed me for several more seconds before a playful smile crept onto her face and she threw a pillow at me. "Of course I do!"

"Promise?"

Mitina giggled, "If anybody is going to be making promises here, it's you."

"Okay." Mitina went to sit on a nearby chair, only to undershoot it by about six inches. She fell to the floor and smiled, adjusting her helmet and gesturing for me to join her. I sighed softly and sat across from her, "You really need to be more careful."

She shrugged it off, "That's what I wear this bulky thing for." She pointed to her helmet, "and the fact that it's mad rad."

"Of course it is."

"It's true! Enough about me though," she smiled lazily before asking 'innocently', "How did things go with Kurloz?"

"Eh…we talked."

Mitina looked unamused, "You know very well, that that is not an acceptable answer. Do I have to get you two put on the-

"No!"

She smirked, and brought her knees up to her chest, "So talk."

Returning back to my darkened hive, I found myself a bit saddened to find it empty, although I had told Kurloz he could leave. It probably was a good idea not to get too close too fast though, especially since we were barely friends. Plus I still wasn't fully convinced I was ready to move on, as I realized today, saying and doing were completely different things. You can say something, but that doesn't necessarily mean you are going to do it. In most cases this was pretty true.

It was still pretty early, for me at least, so I decided to go on the search for my lost jack-in-the-boxes. They _used_ to be my trademark, and if Mitina is going to take me seriously, I need to carry at least one of them around with me. Actually the colored dust bombs were as well…

I was _going_ to check under the couch, since Maulin was always hiding things there, only to find Kurloz curled up on it sleeping. Some of his face paint had smudged off onto his arm, revealing some of his very angular face.

He just seemed so peaceful and calm when he was sleeping, it seemed like it was the only time he looked kind of happy.

I felt bad about waking him up, but I also didn't want him to get sick, since my hive always seemed to be obnoxiously cold, so I fetched an extra blanket from the closet and draped it over him.

Kurloz shifted slightly, at first I thought he was still sleeping, but he opened one of his eyes and peered over at me. _He must be a really light sleeper._ "Uh…don't mind me."

He groggily sat up and slowly signed, _how did things go?_

I placed myself on the floor and began explaining, "Fine, the way it always goes when dealing with one of Mitina's fits, a lot of well-placed ducking."

_Is it okay to assume you patched things up?_

"Yeah, we talked for a while, so I'm assuming we did."

_That's great._

A small smile crept onto his face and I found myself absentmindedly commenting, "You should smile more, it suits you."

He picked up the pace drastically, and I found myself understanding nothing other than 'reason to'. "I didn't get most of this."

Kurloz sighed irritably, promptly picking up the notebook and turning on the table lamp. _This is not continuing on, you will learn how to fucking sigh right now even if it's the last motherfucking thing I do!_

"How hard are you banking on the second option?"

He glared at me, unamused, then began testing me on what I did know. Only it wasn't a lot and he came to realize how much guess work I actually did. He seemed frustrated with the little progress I made about half an hour later, and sighed, probably thinking the same thing was. So I climbed onto the couch and got comfy.


	2. Chappie 2

**Chappie 2**

Looking around after an entire morning of cleaning, the living room and kitchen was completely devoid of Maulen's things. I found myself feeling slightly better than I had, but that didn't stop sorrow from washing over we at the sudden emptiness if the room.

At least Kurloz seemed happy at the 'progress' I had made. Despite the sinking feeling I had involving moving everything back. _You'll get used to it._

Since Kurloz forbade me from talking, I clumsily signed back, _you say that now._

_Acceptance doesn't always happen right away, sometimes it takes time, just be patient._

_You have yet to learn that I am not a very patient person._

Kurloz just stared at me convincingly for several seconds, as if his determination was contagious. There was a loud crash, and the front of my hive shook for several seconds. Already knowing who to expect, I was hoping that Mitina didn't hurt herself.

I opened the front door to find Mitina sitting on the ground looking dazed and confused. She adjusted her crooked helmet and her overturned skateboard lay nearby. She smiled when she saw me and commented, pretty matter-of-factly, "I didn't think that through."

"Apparently not, what did you _think_ would happen?"

"I'd use my mad rad skillz and open the door while moving forward."

I suppressed a sigh at Mitina, once again, thinking she had more skill than she actually did, which was very little, it was actually a wonder she maneuvered around on that thing as easily as she did.

I shifted my weight to one leg, and laced a hand on my hip, prepared to play lusus. "And what gave you the idea that that would motherfucking work?"

"I did it yesterday!" She leapt up, obviously feeling very proud of herself.

"How many times?"

"Two!"

"Out of?"

"Uh…" She took a long time to pick up her skateboard, "I forget." _Meaning a lot._

"I have proved my point." I stepped back into my hive, knowing Mitina followed when she walked into the doorframe with a soft thud. I sighed softly, _with the lack of depth perception she has, you'd think she'd be less coordinated on that skateboard._

As if further proving my thoughts, she began a small circuit around the kitchen and living room. "It looks different in here; did you clean the windows of something? It's mad bright."

She stopped suddenly, just outside the kitchen, and immediately walked into the doorframe on her way into the living room. "I'm confused as to the reason why you haven't concussed yourself yet."

"So am I…" She didn't even bother to attempt to sit on a chair, and flopped onto the floor. She looked over to Kurloz and asked, "'Sup nerd?"

_Nothing, _nerd.

Mitina pouted briefly, then jumped right in to a story about video games. "I was playing Black Ops earlier and I crept up behind this dude and blew his head off! There was blood _everywhere_ and this dude was throwing such a bitch fit!" He told me to suck his fat, pulsating perspiring bulge, and I told him that he didn't sound like his mom from last night ooooooh.

Then I was dying from laughter while he re-spawned and tried to kill _me_! So I stuffed a grenade into his shirt, with a nifty little hack, and fled. I'm assuming you already know what happened next so I'll spare you the _gory_ details." Mitina glanced back and forth between Kurloz and Kurlaz, expecting some sort of praise for the virtual slaughter she had committed. "Am I interrupting something?"

"Shut up you fucking nerd, you're just jealous of my mad rad skills."

"You're _exactally_ right."

"I knew it!" She jumped up and fist-bumped the air. "Behold the radness that is me!" She did a small turned then fell backwards and smacked her head on the floor. She sat up abruptly, exclaimed, "I'm fine!"

"Good, I don't need you passing out on the floor, Letola will cull me."

"Yeah right, I'm more durable than you think. 'sides, it's going to take a lot more than that to knock me out. A brick fell on my helmet yesterday and I barely felt it."

She stated this as if it was just normal for bricks to fall out of the sky; then again, she was pretty unobservant. "A brick?"

"Yup, I don't know where it could have come from though, since I was out taking a walk by the beach…"

"Oh yeah?"

"Yup, what with that face, you look all cereal."

"It's _nothing_. Have you seen Cronas lately?"

"Uh…not that I remember…I'm sure I'd remember…why?"

"Just curious," _just when I was beginning to think she wasn't going to touch her anymore._

"Let me know if anything else happens."

She nodded vigorously, rising from the floor, then smirked deviously, "Well I'll be going now, Tola's expecting me back and I have nothing else to say, I'll leave you two _all alone_." She rolled out the door and, thankfully, easily cleared the stairs. _She's worse than Maulen was._

Just to make sure she couldn't start pestering me, I grabbed my bag, signing, _want to go commit an act of infuriation and hilarity?_

_Do you even need to ask?_


	3. Chappie 3

**Chappie 3**

The forest was unusually quiet, especially since Mitina was supposed to be meeting me out here. I don't know why she picked here, but I was just hoping she didn't get lost, or distracted. "…I don't know, I just said something about a brick."

"You fucking idiot! This is all your fault!"

"Uh, what is?"

"Don't fucking play stupid! Tell that fucking useless moirail of yours to stay away from me, or our next get together might not be so pleasant."

I crept into the clearing and stood behind Cronas who was towering over Mitina as she was sprawled out on the ground. "Why shoot the messenger when the recipient is right here?"

She turned sharply, and if looks could kill I'd probably have been torn limb from limb. "Didn't you like my present? I think you look lovely as a blonde."

He jaw clenched together, and I could tell she was about to break any second now. "Wasa matter wittle fishy, does the wittle skeleton have your tongue?"

Mitina stood up behind me finally realizing what had happened, "Wait a minute, did you do that? I thought that was just a wig or something."

Cronas was shaking from rage, and she directed it towards me. "Kurlaz what the fuck! Fine you break into my hive, smoke bombs were a bit irritating, but dying my shirts red and bleaching my hair! What is wrong with you; do you need mental help!?"

"What's that? I'm sorry; I failed to catch that last part over the sound of a brick falling."

I softly sighed as Mitina looked around for the 'falling brick', "Uh, Kurlaz, I don't see a brick anywhere, I think you need your eyes checked."

"It is an imaginary brick."

"Oh…I knew that! I was just…testing you."

Cronas smirked and unnecessarily commented, "She's a few jokers short of a full deck."

"What's that Blondie?"

"Shut the fuck up you juggalo!"

"I am a skeleton; if you're going to insult someone you should do it properly."

She took a step forward, quickly shifting gears, "I'd be more than happy to drop the whole thing if you and me had a little get together."

She adjusted the collar on my coat, and I stepped around her, "I'll pass, Blondes are notorious whores and I only like committed relationships. Besides, I have plans and am out of your league."

I dragged Mitina up off the ground and started walking away. "That was a nice save."

"Thanks, now stay away from her, and inform me if anything else should happen, okay?"

"Right! Hey, me and you and Kurloz and Mituna should team up sometime! It'd be mad rad!"

"And just what would we do?"

"Uh…I don't know…anything! Besides you _know_ you want an excuse to spend some time with Kurloz."

"…now what gives you that impression?"

"You guys are perfect for each other! You guys are both pros at 'dark and creepy' besides- She walked directly into a tree and fell backwards.

"That's what happens when you gossip."

Mitina quickly got up and adjusted her helmet, "No! I'm just clumsy."

"Suuure."

"It's true! You're just jealous of my mad rad skills."

"Of course I am."

"Told ya!" She tripped over a root and fell forward.

I sighed but helped her up, "Watch where you are going!"

"I am…" She adjusted her helmet, and made it about ten feet before crashing into another tree, _it's a miracle she got all the way out here by herself._


	4. Chappie 4

**Chappie 4**

_I'm going to cull Mitina._ I took one slight glance at my candlelit hive and almost had an aneurism. For a moment I almost found myself happy with the job well done Mitina had since she obviously hadn't set any fires, but Kurloz's quizzical glance put a stop to that. _Mitina is trying her hand at shipping._

_Oh that's…interesting?_

_Not really._ I was about ready to throw a temper tantrum that would put Mitina to shame. After I had told her not to do anything, and that I could handle myself, she goes and does something like this! I never did anything like this to her when she was gushing over Letola from a distance, so why does she have to take such an interest in my relationship?!

I sighed softly, and turned on the lights, before beginning to blow out the candles. Kurloz followed, and paced them on a nearby table, so they were at least in one place. I glanced around, trying to weed out any more potential shipping attempts, but didn't feel like going into any great lengths. There was always time for that later. _Want to go take a walk or something?_

_Sure, why not. Where do you want to go?_

_Doesn't matter, around._

Apparently around meant the woods, but it was fine with me, since nobody else would casually be strolling along out here. It was also a lot better than just sitting inside, in close proximities. Out in the woods there was the excuse of not wanting to lose one another….at least that was the excuse I made for myself as to why I was holding his hand. _Besides we are just friends and he is still red for Meulin, it doesn't matter how I feel. Not that I plan on moving on anytime soon, what's so bad about having a close friend?_

That was something else that bothered me, just because two troll are close someone automatically assumes they are together or should be. Aren't you _supposed_ to be close to your friends? If not, what's the point in even making them?

Apparently the internal rant I was going on showed, because Kurloz asked, _what's wrong?_

"Uh, nothing," I smiled sheepishly, and ran a hand through my curls with my free hand, "I was just kind of talking to myself. If Mitina was here she would say, and I quote, 'Ignore the stupid nerd, she does this all the time'."

_Doesn't that contradict itself?_

"What?"

_A stupid nerd?_

"It's Mitina. Half the time it's a miracle she can walk and talk at the same time."

_Not going to argue with that. What were you 'talking' about?_

"Nothing of any interest…I can't even remember myself."

I attempted an impish grin, but Kurloz wasn't buying it, I could tell, but he chose not to pursue the subject any further. He gently squeezed my hand, and smiled slightly. Why was beyond me, but my guess was as good as anybody else's.

Despite not knowing why he was doing this, a small smile crept onto my own face as this warm, fuzzy feeling crept over me.

* * *

_I'm not ready for this._ I had curled myself up on the floor in Maulen's respite block with one of his shirts, refusing to accept the fact that I may have…_red_ feelings for Kurloz. It was terrifying. I promised myself I wouldn't do this again, I was happy alone before, so why change that now? You don't just tell yourself you're ready to move on, beginning the healing process, then jump right back into another relationship! It makes you seem desperate, or stupid. Either way, I refused to seem like I was either. _He wouldn't notice me anyway, he said so himself that he's still hung up on Meulin._

* * *

_I hear you've been hanging out with _Kurlaz _lately._

Meulin grinned impishly, her fangs protruding ever so slightly, and her tail slowly twitched back and forth. _So? What's so bad about spending time with someone?_

Nothing_._

Her grin only widened, as if she as seeing exactally what she wanted to. _Stop. I already know what you're doing. I don't need to be shipped. No._

_Who said I ship you? I'm just pointing out that I'm not the only one who thinks it's adorable._

_Don't tell me you are in cahoots with Mitina._

She glanced around as if something was catching her attention, _it wouldn't surprise me if she had placed all the candles herself._

_Don't get all pouty, I'm just trying to help _you _out. Since we aren't matesprits anymore, the least I can do is help you out with your quadrants._

_So you're saying, you _wouldn't _be getting involved if we didn't used to be together?_

Meulin glanced around the room, and quickly changed the subject. _You guys to go on a date._

_No thank you. Besides she expressed several times that she isn't ready to move on._

_I'm sure she's just saying that; give her a shove in the right direction._


	5. Chappie 5

**Chappie 5**

I barreled towards the door of Kurlaz's hive and managed to open it and roll right into the house. "Told you I could do it Tola!"

Tola snorted and rolled his eyes, "Go do it again."

"I don't need to!" I stuck my tongue out at him and roamed into the darkened hive. "Kurlaz, you in here?"

She didn't respond and I wandered down the side hallway, crashing into the doorway. I sighed softly and adjusted my helmet, _everything is so blurry._

I peeked into her respite block; since the door was open, only to not find her in there. _I bet she's out with Kurloz._

I went to go back outside, but stopped just outside Maulen's door, _she better not me in there._ I held my breath and fumbled for the doorknob before managing to open the door. I pushed to door open, ever so slightly to find her sleeping on the floor with one of his green shirts. _Not again! What the hell did he do!?_

I stormed out of her hive, ignoring the doorway as I crashed into it; I made sure to slam the door back and jumped on my black-and-yellow skateboard. "Tina?"

"She's still sleepin. Let's go see Kurloz though."

"Alright," Letola followed behind, not asking any questions.

* * *

"What did you do to her?!"

Kurloz eyed me, seeming confused. He managed to find a piece of paper and a pen, and scribbled, _who?_

"Don't act stupid you fucking nerd! Kurlaz!"

_Nothing, she was fine when I left yesterday._

"That doesn't mean anything! You don't how she gets! What did you say to her?!"

He sighed, and gave up on the paper. _Nothing, like I said, we just took a walk._

"Where?!"

_The woods, your or Meulin's candle stunt didn't go down to well with her._

"Why would you take her there!?"

_I didn't take her anywhere, she was the one who suggested and she was the one leading the way! What are you even accusing me of?_

"She's all depressed again, and you were the one who's been spending the most time with her recently so you must have done something! It's not my fault if you're thinkpan is too fucked up for you to understand other's feeling but you damn well better keep Kurlaz out of it!"

Tola guided me backwards and gently urged, "Tina let's go, we can come back later, okay?"

"Fine." I started following her, "just as long as _someone_ knows this isn't over!"

* * *

Kurloz cautiously approached Kurlaz's hive, unsure of how he was supposed to react in a satiation like this. He had yet to sort out the own stormy emotions that were whirling around with him. _I can barely solve my own problems; why did I believe I could help her?_ He sighed softly as he stood in front of the door, contemplating whether or not he should even go in.

Then he reassessed the present situation in a different view. The person he subconsciously, sometimes considered his matesprit, was alone, obviously needing someone, and refusing to admit it.

Kurloz closed his eyes for several seconds, before placing his hand on the cold doorknob and entering Kurlaz's seemingly empty hive. He closed the door back and crossed the main room over to the side hallway and entered the first door on the right.

Kurlaz was curled up on the floor with one of Maulen's green shirts, pretending to sleep. Kurloz knew better than to fall for it, since she was breathing much too fast, and knew all too well that it was an effective strategy for warding off any unwanted visitors.

He slowly closed the door back and sat on the floor, leaning against that wall, knowing he could outwait her…at least he _thought_ he could.

After about half an hour Kurlaz sighed softly, and sat up to half-heartedly glare at Kurloz. "Why are you still here?"

Despite her attempt at being feisty, Kurloz recognized the poorly masked sad, despondent, faraway look. He had it on every time he was reminded of _that night_. Lost love has a way hollowing you out and leaving you an empty shell of a person. He slowly signed, _I want to be; and you left your door unlocked, so anyone can come wandering in if it pleases them._

"You've proved your point," she went back to lying on her makeshift pillow, and closed her eyes, "Just leave me alone."

She wanted to be done with this conversation, but Kurloz wouldn't let her be, knowing everything would only go downhill from there…or perhaps forget the going downhill part and just straight off the cliff into oblivion. _I'm not leaving._

"Why not; everyone else did."

_I know you don't really want to be alone._

"You don't _know_ that."

_Yes I do; I've been here before…and probably still haven't completely left._

"It doesn't matter," she turned her back on Kurloz, and stared at the opposite blue wall. "I can't be what you want me to be, I'm not ready. As good of an idea as this seemed in my head, I can't do it. I'm not ready to forget because if I do, everyone else will too, and it'll be like he was never here in the first place."

Kurlaz wiped a stray purple tear off the side of her face, while Kurloz inched forward and coaxed her into his lap. There wasn't much he could say at this point, let alone do, other than lightly stroke her hair in a last ditch effort to calm her down.

Not that he was really in any rush. Despite the present circumstances, he liked having her close to him. And he could wait for her. Wait until she was ready to move on, or just until she wanted another friend. He wanted to be there for her, no matter how long he had to wait.

**And…this was the last chappie, surprise! Ah…Kurloz needs to be shipped more :/ anywho, what'd you guys think?**


End file.
